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Got a good reason For taking the easy way out
Black and White Background courtesy of free backgrounds




...if I could talk to the animals ---

As we walked the Garden grounds and entered several of the abodes that housed tropical plants, we could stop and talk to the animals. One was very ornate but said not a word!! Some ignored us completely, while others conversed...saying who knows what...while others just watched every step we took ---





Dolphin sculpture - Broomeliad House


Iguana


Tropical Birds


Cockatiel


"Snackin'"Turtle


Amazon Parrot



connected to: Camera Critters [linked button at top of blog]
and by invitation, I am joining in a fairly new blog meme...Saturday Sareenity; linked with this button:


Saturday Sareenity




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WEEKEND FUNNIES


This guy is in a plane when he feels thirsty. He calls the stewardess and asks her politely for a Large Whiskey.There's a parrot in the seat next to him, who snaps,"A double Scotch and make it quick". "Yes ,sir"the stewardess says, and quickly gets the bird his drink - but ignores the guy. The parrot downs his in one gulp, and says "gimme another". The stewardess gets him a second drink, ignoring the guy again. The guy, meanwhile has been asking for his drink very politely. He decides to use the parrot's tactics and snarls at the stewardess,"You @#*$# hag, get me my bloody Scotch!". Suddenly a large co-pilot comes out of the cockpit and ejects both the guy and the parrot off the plane. As they're falling, the parrot turns to the guy and says "You know, you're quite brave for someone who can't fly...".

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Polygram Records, Warner Brothers and Keebler: New company will be called Poly-Warner-Cracker.

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Mrs. Broomfield's dishwasher quit working, so she called a repairman. He couldn't accommodate her with an evening appointment,and since she had to go to work the next day, she told him: "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you the check. By the way, don't worry about my Rottweiler. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do not under any circumstances talk to my parrot!" When the repairman arrived at Mrs. Broomfield's apartment the next day, he discovered the biggest and meanest looking Rottweiler he had ever seen. But, just like she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet, watching the repairman go about his business. However, the whole time he was there, the parrot drove him nuts with his incessant squawking and talking. Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled: "Shut up, you stupid bird!" To which the parrot replied: "Get him, Brutus!"

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Four brothers left home for college, and they became successful doctors and lawyers and prospered. Some years later, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who lived far away in another city.
The first said, "I had a big house built for Mama."
The second said, "I had a hundred thousand dollar theater built in the house."
The third said "I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her."
The fourth said, "You know how Mama loved reading the Bible and you know she can't read anymore because she can't see very well. I met this preacher who told me about a parrot that can recite the entire Bible. It took twenty preachers 12 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000 a year for twenty years to the church, but it was worth it. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse and the parrot will recite it."
The other brothers were impressed. After the holidays Mom sent out her thank you notes.
"She wrote: "Milton, the house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway."
"Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home, I have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks."
"Michael, you gave me an expensive theater with Dolby sound, it could hold 50 people, but all my friends are dead, I've lost my hearing and I'm nearly blind. I'll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same."
"Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give little thought to your gift. The chicken was delicious. Thank you."

38 comments :

  1. I like the jokes, but I'm loving these beautiful photos you have taken!!! Also the beautiful pattern on the tortoise shell!

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  2. Enjoyed the jokes, lol

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  3. I have a soft spot for all of the beautiful animals you posted. Great pics.

    Great jokes.

    I love what you've done with the background btw.

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  4. apart from the dolphin, the others were all real right?

    n ur funnies bought a smile to my sat afternoon :)


    also, i'd really appreciate if you could contribute for Saturday Sareenity.

    have a great weekend,
    cheers!

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  5. Rohit....yes, you're correct. Besides the dolphin sculpture, the rest are all REAL/live animals.

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  6. Love the jokes - especially that last one!

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  7. Hi Anni, a great critter post. I love the tropical birds and the iguana. The turtle is cool, great shots. I really enjoyed the funnies too. My favorite was the one with the parrot and Brutus. Very funny. Have a wonderful weekend!

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  8. Love the snackin' turtle. :))

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  9. those are lovely photos... i love the last one :)

    http://thelayugan.blogspot.com/2012/01/at-river.html

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  10. ... a very nice photo series, which is framed by beautiful poetry.
    thanks for stopping on my blog ...
    Greetings Karin

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  11. Liebe Anni,

    das sind ganz, ganz wundervolle Fotos, ich liebe Tiere und Blumen, die Natur.

    Knuddel ♥ Marianne

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  12. Nice pictures. I like the turtle, too. :-)

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  13. What a nice Garden tour!!
    LOL I love the Saturday funnies. Especially the parrot/rottweiler story. Our daughter and son in law have a Quaker Parrot, Taz, who was about 2 yo when they got their cat Harley (BTW the two pets get along beautifully and respect each other space). They were hoping Taz would quickly learn to say "Harley, No" because that was all they said for the first several months after the very active kitty joined the family.
    Hugs Madi and Mom

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  14. Lovely animal shots! Wouldn't it be interesting to know what they are thinking?

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  15. Lovely heart theme here on your blog! Loved the excellent photos of the animals - so interesting! Caught up on your other posts too - great job on the sandpipers all in a row!

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  16. Too funny and I enjoyed talking with the animals .. especially the dolphin... :D :D :D

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  17. Thanks for the laughs, Anni.
    Mama Bear

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  18. They have a wonderful world of their own... if only we could understand.
    Great pictures.

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  19. love all the animal pics!

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  20. Love your photos and your ideology! I am a new follower...thanks for your courage and your soapbox!

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  21. Like reading your weekend funnies :D
    If I could talk to the animals...I'll be a vegetarian...

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  22. What a neat place to visit. I love Amazon parrots.

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  23. Beautiful shots!
    My favorite is the Parrot!
    Thanks for sharing.
    Have a great weekend.

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  24. Your posts are always so entertaining! You had me laughing out loud, and now I want an iguana ;-)

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  25. Great Polly jokes Anni

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  26. I thought the two birds were my favorite, but then I saw the turtle. So cool to see!

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  27. Awesome captures!

    Fur Baby for camera critters. Looking forward to your visit.

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  28. That looks like a delightful place to visit! I love the texture/pattern on the turtle's shell.

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  29. Great jokes, I love them all!
    It looks like the garden has quite a collection of animals both real and not so real. That turtle looks like a big fellow.
    Hope you are having a great weekend Anni.
    Judy

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  30. That chicken bit cracked me up, Anni. I'm mathematically impaired, but even I can figure out $100,000 a year for 20 years isn't chicken feed.
    K

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  31. Beautiful birds, so much variety.

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  32. I'd love to be right there with the Amazon Parrot.

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  33. thank you for accepting the invite and contributing to Saturday Sareenity :)

    although i dont like seeing birds caged, tropical birds and parrots can be quite fun and lively. my uncle had a parrot so friendly that he wasn't even caged after 6 months. he even flew in an out of the house n came back. but was smart enough to not fly in the house.

    tx again...have a great sunday!

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  34. Such wonderful captures you've got, thanks for sharing these beauties Anni!

    Here's my first Saturday Sareenity entry, hope you can visit.

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  35. I'm so glad someone else asked first (living or sculpture). I thought the birds were alive but wasn't sure about the turtle. Beautiful coloring on that sweetie.

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