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Got a good reason For taking the easy way out

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               during our trip to GLADYS PORTER ZOO
photo taken: 2010

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A young pet monkey had an accident and needed a brain transplant. The veterinarian told the monkey's human family, "Brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the cost yourselves."
"Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the family.
"For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000," replied the vet.
All the men in the family nodded because they thought they understood. But the mother was unsatisfied and asked, "Why the difference in price between male and female brains?"
"Standard pricing practice," said the vet. "The female brains have to be marked down because they’ve actually been used!".

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A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car. The officer looked down at the monkey and said "I wish you could talk." The monkey looked up at the officer and shook his head up and down.

"You can understand what I'm saying?" asked the officer. Again, the monkey shook his head up and down.
"Well, did you see this?"
"Yes," motioned the monkey.
"What happened?"
The monkey pretended to have a can in his hand and turned it up by his mouth.
"They were drinking?" asked the officer.
"Yes," nodded the Monkey.
"What else?" asked the officer.
The monkey pinched his fingers together and held them to his mouth, sucking inward quickly.
"They were smoking marijuana too?" said the officer.
"Yes," nodded the Monkey.
"What else?" queried the officer.
The monkey motioned with his fingers...
"Having sex!. They were having sex, too!?" asked the astounded officer.
"Yes," nodded the monkey.
"Now wait, you're saying your owners were drinking, smoking and having sex before they wrecked?"
"Yes," the Monkey nodded.
"What were you doing during all this?" asked the Officer.
"Driving," motioned the monkey.


  1. These are all good ones! Thanks for the morning laugh. :)

  2. MOL Anni you made my Mom cackle today.
    Happy Saturday,
    Hugs Madi and Mom

  3. GREAT laugh today!!! Fun post~~~

  4. Annie I love the chimp!! You gotter right in the hear no evil, see no evil,speak no evil. Politicians never ADMIT to anything!!

  5. HILARIOUS!!! Love them all, thanks for sharing.

  6. Thanks for the much needed smile this evening! I have the most horrible cold and can't breathe -- this helped me feel better :-)

  7. Lol ! Nice post to read early morning with the first cup of coffee !

  8. LOL ok those jokes were too funny! Especially that last one, I can just picture that monkey with the officer! hehe My youngest brother's favourite stuffed toy was a monkey my parents had bought for him at Santa's Village and one day one of my older brothers and I were throwing it to each other when it ripped and the stuffing fell youngest brother was so devastated and really thought we'd have to have a funeral until mom sewed it back up! lol xoxo