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Got a good reason For taking the easy way out




Today, for Ten on Tuesday we're supposed to list ten things we dislike about our job. Since I am retired now for about 13 years, an out-of-home job doesn't exist.
So, I'm going along with the request to list things that make being an at-home retiree's job boring and certainly tasteless and despicable!

1) I don't like to have to make beds each and every day! [Wait. I don't. What's the purpose of straightening the bedspread and sheets, and then changing linens, when 6 months later you have to start all over?]

2) Cooking has become a chore that is not happening!! We go out to eat a lot. That's how much I don't like cooking anymore. But, when I AM in the mood...it's all fattening and not good for you, so what's the point? I don't like to clean dishes nor countertops nor stovetops--so, dining out serves more than one purpose if you ask me.

3) I don't do 'cleaning out of refrigerator' anymore until something inside, on the shelves, actually CLOSES the door for me. Culture [the green fuzzy stuff in the back on the middle shelf] is not my style. If it walks out of the refrigerator on its own, let it go!!

4) Speaking of cooking, on the list as #2, I don't like cooking fried chicken in the nude!! Those are NOT freckles!!

5) I don't sweep, that's how much I don't like it. The only sweeping that gets done these days is when I sweep the room with a slight glance here and there.

6) Vacuuming? Nope, nope, nope!! I'm not gonna do it until Sears or Eureka makes a riding vacuum. Men have riding lawn mowers, and Bob Villa -- why not something for the woman of the house? Martha Stewart, are you listening?

7) I never mark the date of my signature in the dust on the tables! You think I'm insane?

8) I stopped doing laundry a lot. Why, one time when I was separating hubby's clothes and I asked him if he wanted a certain sweatshirt of his washed in hot or cold....he asked "What does it say on the shirt?" I answered back "University of Arizona." He now does the laundry more than I. *pointing to my skull* ---"Brains, not Blond".

9) Cleaning ovens! YuK!! If you think ovens are made for baking or roasting only, think twice. [Psssst ---it's a great place to hide a multitude of unfinished projects like dirty dishes or those special garments that hubby is looking for on laundry day!!! But, just make sure they're not flammable!!]

10) And last but not least, let's not forget cleaning the toilet. I really detest this chore. I have a sure-fire way tho. Very simple, and much easier than any other nasty job of housework. Here are the 9 steps for cleaning the toilet that I picked up from talking with the neighbor's dog [who happens to hate our cats]. It really cuts your day of work short, allowing time for more fun things!!!

How to clean your toilet:

—————1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

—————2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

—————3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

—————4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

—————5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash" and "rinse".

—————6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

—————7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

—————8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

—————9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.


NOTE: And Gattina 'n' P J, NO CATS WERE HARMED MAKING THIS LIST AND TESTING IT TWICE. [Just kidding with the whole list of 10 things I don't like about my job, of course]

Next week: 10 things we LOVE about our job.

7 comments :

  1. Too funny...a couple of mine actually enjoy playing in the toilet. Rhett dropped a mousie in there not long ago...lol.

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  2. Thank you for a very fun read this morning. As I am the Bather Of Cats in our household, I can very much appreciate your method. Perhaps I'll try it next time. I'm sure to save money on bandages.

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  3. Loved your post!! =D I think housework should be outlawed,its never ending and oh so repetitive.Especially when you have a teenager under your roof!!!
    Have a wonderful day!

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  4. Funny!!
    You know when Kelly takes a shower our two cats(one is a kitten) and Zeek a big brown haired cat sits in front of the shower and they wait on her!! When she steps out they act like WHEW you made it out alive!! and you let all that water run over you!! We get a big kick watching them sit there every morning!!

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  5. But I do so hate cleaning toilets! Great list.

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  6. Blah ha ha! Love the toilet cleaning advice! (BTW, G/T stands for gifted/talented. It's a small group of kids who "tested" into the program. Sorry - I forget that other people read my blog besides me!)

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  7. Hahaha ! I just wanted to suggest not to clean the toilet that way !! But you shouldn't say it's a joke, people who take such things seriously should live with their problems !
    I agree to all points with my full heart ! I became the laziest pensioner in the whole world ! First I have a cleaning women so no need to bother my cats for the toilet and second I also don't cook anymore (or only occasionally) I found a very good solution. We go out or most of the time I go once a week to a catering service (we have a very nice quality/price one here in Waterloo) and buy everthing already prepared. Vegetables, potatoes, meat in sauces, indian, chinese. Then I put the menu together. When it's something to be fried like a steak I do it but Mr. Gattino cleans the pan. For pasta he is the responsible. The plates go in the dishwasher I do the hard job of pushing on the button and he empties the dishwasher. Laundry is done while I am blogging, the only thing is to fold the whole stuff and put it away. There I haven't found a solution. I don't iron anymore either, I only buy stuff which has not to be ironed.
    I have cooked and cleaned enough in my life now I am retired and I enjoy life ! And people who don't like my way of living can go to hell, Mr. Gattino doesn't complain and that's the most important thing because I live with him and not with others. So you are completely right. Enjoy life and don't loose time with household stuff !

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