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NEWS FLASH:
I NOW HAVE A BOOK PUBLISHED


Titled Wings Over My Texas
Description excerpt: A non-scientific photographic study of over 200 birds, common, rare, and vagrant birds, along the Coastal Bend of South Texas. Areas include Corpus Christi, Port A...
check out the book details on this linked site!!



~Some Fun for Saturday Afternoon Humor


A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just pitched a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that! The teenager tells her
"Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You gotta let your rose buds show!" and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate....

The grandmother says,"Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show off your rose buds, then I can display my hanging baskets.


What? Y'all thought of something else, perhaps?


Thanks goes to Moogie @ Moogie's World for this story!!



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This 30 second commercial for Budweiser I saw during an Astros game on tv...and it's a hoot!!! [But! I can't figure out what the guy with the canned beer says, can you?]

Beer Commercial

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A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client. He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took the lawyer three months to track down. After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply.

"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title.
While we compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property back to 1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin."

Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:

"Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I note that you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country, particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased, by the U.S., from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application. For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France, which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Isabella. The good queen, Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus' expedition. Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God, it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also made that part of the world called Louisiana.
God, therefore, would be the owner of origin and His origins date back, to before the beginning of time, the world as we know it AND the FHA. I hope you find God's original claim to be satisfactory. Now, may we have our damn
loan?"

The loan was approved.

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Little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"
Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat."
"What's that mean?" asked the child.
"Go ask your father.
I think he's in the garage."
The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block?
I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."
Dad said, "Bring Belle over here."
He took a rag, soaked it with petrol, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said
"OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block."

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash.

Surprised, Dad asked, "Where's Belle?

The little girl said, "She ran out of petrol about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home.

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2 comments :

  1. Anni! The guy with the can says "First time at the opera boys?" LOL! They should KNOW better than to bring bottles!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Love the jokes, Anni, especially the one about grandma and her hanging baskets! Too funny...

    ReplyDelete

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